


Behind the Veil

by RueRambunctious



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Afterlife, Betrayal, Crack Relationships, Crack Treated Seriously, Crack and Angst, Delusions, Emotionally Repressed, Feels, Loneliness, M/M, Sexual Repression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-04
Updated: 2016-08-04
Packaged: 2018-07-29 09:04:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7678324
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RueRambunctious/pseuds/RueRambunctious
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There are some secrets that are never spoken of in life, but no one need know what happens behind the Veil.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Behind the Veil

What no one had told Harry was that the veil did not mean death –not exactly. The veil forced you into an exquisitely agonising combination of heaven and hell tailored precisely to the soul who crossed through. It wasn’t death, it was worse. 

It was possible to bring someone back from the veil but no one said this. It was better for Harry to believe Sirius was dead than for Sirius to be brought back, changed by the veil. The people who were brought back from the veil were irrevocably damaged, a worse sight than someone Kissed. The poor damned souls were beyond haunted by the events that transpired beyond the veil. They would be insane, certainly, and only grow more so. There was no one who had been brought back from the veil who had not either killed themselves or returned to the veil and thrown themselves back through it. 

People who knew chose not to think about Sirius. Sirius would have envied them that, had he been able to think clearly enough.

He knew he’d passed the veil. Knew the moment Bellatrix’s curse hit his chest that he was doomed to the veil. Knew he was doomed to what that meant.

It wasn’t until he’d actually seen that little blonde head of hair that he felt the full, overwhelming horror of what this truly meant. In that frozen moment he agonised over what his future held. Then the fear broke, and he wondered if anyone would find the photograph in his room, and know his fate. Remus wouldn’t be able to bring himself to enter his room, but Molly or Arthur might. Would it be lost on them that he had never ripped that little blonde boy off of the edge of the photograph?

Absently Sirius hoped it would. He wanted no one to know this, his greatest sin.

He continued to stand still, gazing at the back that faced him. He felt emotion swelling in his chest, and he hoped the teenage boy would not turn around, even although Sirius knew he wanted him to.

The boy must have sensed the intensity of Sirius’ stare, or perhaps had heard his ragged breathing. He turned around, and his features were flooded with delight. “Sirius!”

Sirius continued to stare at the other, even as the teen launched himself at him, wrapping his arms around Sirius’ neck. Sirius could smell strawberries, the boy’s very unmasculine shampoo. He closed his eyes for a moment and deeply inhaled the scent.

“Sirius!” the boy said again, his voice breathless with adoration. “Oh, I’ve been waiting on you forever. I missed you!”

Sirius glanced down at himself because the blonde’s gaze was so intense. Sirius’ body was that of a teenager again, but there were no school uniforms. He couldn’t pretend this was a memory. The boy’s hug had spun him around, and from this direction Sirius could see the graves. He couldn’t forget what had been done.

“Sirius?” the boy said in concern. “Is something wrong?” His lip jutted out in concern, and Sirius had never seen anything so fucking kissable.

He leaned forwards, catching it, forcing every bit of need and passion and self-loathing into the kiss. He tore the boy’s teeshirt off and then his own, swiftly knocking the boy to the ground in his frenzy.

The blonde moaned, his white flesh stark against the dark stone graves. Each bite Sirius left turned red and stood out screaming on the teen’s skin, an accusation of the worst kind.

“You’re crying,” the boy said.

Sirius shook his head. “I’m alright. As long as I’ve got you, that’s all that really matters.”

The blonde smiled at him and chased the tears with his lips, brushing them away with chaste kisses that held more love and promise than Sirius could bear. “That’s alright then,” said the boy. “We’ll always be together Sirius. I love you.”

Sirius’ shoulders shook with sobs even as he crushed the teen’s lips against his own. “I love you too,” he tore out, falling onto his back as the blonde wrenched down his trousers. Sirius stared at the names cut into the graves even as he reached to yank down his lovers jeans and shorts.

“I love you too,” Sirius said, feeling the stone cut into his flesh as the blonde boy pushed up against him. “I’ve always loved you, Peter.”


End file.
